write-off

when do you write off a member of your family? it's a question i've been asking myself for a couple of weeks now and i'm stuck between 21st century, north american sensibilities and good, ol' fashioned family values. on the one hand, family is everything - when your friends and acquaintances have faded away, all you have left is your family. on the other hand, is maintaining a relationship with a family member (just for the sake of having the relationship and alleviating some guilt) worth risking your mental health and all-around happiness? what if this person has written you off first - do you become the "bigger person" and continue to maintain a thread of the former relationship to keep up appearances or do you respect their feelings and become part of their history? what if you don't even care? a lot of questions that i don't have any answers for. no clue.